Could you be feeling stuck based on your lack of authenticity? Ever notice that feeling in your heart or your stomach that you are not being true to yourself in your words or actions?

Maybe it’s not straight up lying but a toxic addiction to approval seeking though trying to please people short term? Maybe you tell yourself it’s just a way of making yourself or others just a little bit more comfortable in a certain situation? Could be with your friends, spouse/significant other, siblings, children, parents, or boss?

These are unreal conversations and relationships. They can never truly serve you or move you forward. Even if they are not completely dishonest they are fantasy conversations. (like a recommendation for only positive thinking) The consequences of these conversations and relations can be very expensive. The cost can be resentment, guilt, anger, a consistent feeling of uneasiness, or even physical problems in the body.

Want to avoid these costs and move towards what Ralph Waldo Emerson calls “the greatest accomplishment”?

Start with laying a simple (not easy) foundation. Start by saying YES when you want to say YES and NO when you want to say NO in all circumstances. Start with the small things such as lunch with a friend, driving out of your way to meet somebody, letting your children have something you think will make them happy or keep the peace for the moment, or attending a family function when you have other plans.

Once you build your authenticity on the smaller circumstances, you will be ready to tackle the ones that have a bigger impact on your life and happiness long term.